That dreaded Monday morning has come round incredibly fast. I had a pretty productive weekend with the blog! I am now well into my third week of blogging, and I’m really enjoying the experiences coming with it.
Today is the the 7th day of my blogging challenge – which is also making me realise how quickly we are moving through February! This year is already flying by!
Today’s challenge is:
4 Things I’d Like to Say to Three Different People
I cannot count how many times I have been tempted to send you an email full of anger and hate to make you realise what your actions did to another person’s life. I realise now that it would be pointless because you are bitter and use other people’s misery to make you feel alive and powerful.
I would like to say your bullying and lack of compassion, your hate campaign against me for no reason whatsoever, was one of the worst things I have ever been through. I have never spent nights crying myself to sleep and still woke up crying as I did in those months I spent working for you. I spent 3 years at university working up confidence in myself, my abilities, feeling geared up to go into the real world – and it took you just 4 months to destroy all of that. I hope it made you happy and feel powerful. You made me feel I wasn’t capable of a basic desk job; that I had no place in your toxic work environment. I believed you. I spent the following 6 months in my house, no motivation to leave or look after myself. I contemplated not being here anymore, you put me in a place where I convinced myself that my family and the people I love would be better off without me. I survived.
I would like to say that you did not succeed in your mission to break me. I came back and then some. I found my self-worth, got my confidence back, made a reputation for myself. You told me I couldn’t do a desk job. Yet – I’m now the coordinator of over 400 people in a project that I self-manage. I took your words and your actions, and I turned them into nothing. I’m on top of my game and you did not win. I did.
I believe it was fate that we met. I came to you after 6 months of hell, hoping you would offer me a temporary job to help me get by. You know what you did instead? You gave me my life back. When I came to you, I was broken with no self-confidence and no belief in my abilities or my worth. You nurtured me, took care of me and believed in me.
I would like to say that if I could aspire to be anyone in the whole world, it would be you. You are the most amazing manager, woman, person, friend. I would not be here without you and I am so honoured to have worked with you. When you told me you were leaving, my heart broke and I decided to leave too. You pushed me to apply for a job way above my grade and in disbelief, I got it. You told me I was worth more and you made me believe it. You are my inspiration to work hard and be the best person I can be. If I can be just a fraction of the person you are, I will leave this world content and proud. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to show what I am capable of, and helping me get back that carefree and happy side of me that I lost. You are amazing, and I miss you every single day. x
To my niece,
I remember the first day they brought you home and placed you in my arms. I was so proud of this beautiful little bundle wrapped in a baby pink blanket, holding her hands together. You were the most precious thing I had ever met, and I wanted to protect you, love you and be your friend forever.
You are now 10 years old; I have watched you take your first steps, speak your first words and turn into a beautiful, smart young lady over the years. I fear for you in this world that does not wait for you to be ready for it. I want you to remain innocent, carefree and kind. I do not want you to have to face the harsh realities of what is to come or the worrying lifestyle your generation faces. I hoped to protect you and keep you safe but I cannot protect you from yourself and your curiosity.
I hope you achieve all the things you hope to achieve; I always told you that you had the potential to go as far as your dreams could carry you, and to work hard for what you want. I cannot make your choices for you. In a year’s time, you will be going into high school and your teenage life will begin. I still see that little girl in her nappies and tiny shoes, and my eyes fill with tears at the times gone by. You are too pure for this nasty world.
I want to say to you that I love you, I hope you live a life full of opportunities and happiness, and that you are free from heartache, worry and confusion. You are capable of anything. There’s no telling what the world will be when you go into it as an adult – but please don’t let it break you.