It’s been an amazing Friday! It’s my blog’s one month anniversary, and I’ve engaged with so many people today, it’s been fabulous! What a way to celebrate.
Today’s challenge is about discussing something that made me unhappy – so whilst I’m buzzing from the blog’s day, I will share with you something that made me sad today. I’m not going to use images in this post as I think the content doesn’t need making light of. It’s incredibly serious and worrying and I hope you take something from this as I have.
Something That Made Me Sad Today
I get the bus to and from work – which can be frustrating when they don’t show or are late, common in one of the biggest cities in the country – but I do love the long journey with a good book and some music. But today, my journey was an unhappy one and here’s why.
Mid-way into my journey, some 13-14 year old boys got on. You could hear them before the doors to the bus even opened – and I was sat upstairs near the back. They were swearing and shouting as they walked up the stairs. An older man sat at the front asked them to ‘keep the volume down please as there’s kids on the bus’ – to which one of the boy’s responded ‘I don’t have a volume button you nonce.’ I was mortified. This guy had no chance of getting through to them, and this became obvious when they came and sat behind me and I could hear every single word of their conversation.
As soon as they took up their seats, I got edgy. They started shouting ‘nonce’ really loud to this poor guy – and everybody on the bus realised that nobody would be able to say a word to them because of their obvious lack of respect. They gave up on shouting at this guy, and proceeded to have an extremely loud private conversation between them. What ensued was the most disturbing conversation I’ve ever heard 13 year olds have.
One of them started talking about a girl he had been talking to online from London. He proudly stated ‘she sent me a picture of her tits’. His friend asked why he didn’t go and meet up with her for a shag – he replied ‘nah she doesn’t want to’ – to which his friend replied ‘well, you go down and get her then’ – insinuating you can take what you what, you don’t ask and you don’t wait for permission. I couldn’t believe these kids, aged just 13, were talking about the possibility of a subject such as rape – and so disturbingly casually. The first lad then laughed and said ‘I’d jizz on her teeth’ and about her getting him off. Now I’m not one to be easily disgusted; I’ve heard and seen a lot of things that don’t shock me now. But this was actually physically painful to witness.
The main lad moved his topic on to prostitutes – stating he would just use a ‘prozzy’ instead. He then made a joke about the possibility of finding a ‘100 year old prozzy with a saggy minge’ and that he’d struggle to find the difference between her two holes. They moved on to masturbation, how they do it and where – until eventually their stop came and they got off the bus.
It was so revolting to hear from a CHILD’s mouth and I can’t stop thinking about how sad it is. These children have obviously either been dragged up, not brought up, to think speaking so disrespectfully about women is normal – or they have been influenced by things such as porn that normalises the abuse of women as though it is a normal part of healthy sex. These kids were at an age where sex should just be starting to be discussed in school – but these children were talking like a load of chavvy drunk blokes on a lad’s night out.
I feel so sad about the corruption these kids have already experienced – and it is extremely difficult to reverse the effects of that. They have learned from somewhere that it is normal to disrespect women, treat them as meaningless, sexual objects and not as people. What hope is there for their future when there is so little respect but so much expectation on their behalf for a woman to be open to being abused and subject to their ridicule? Today, I lost a bit of hope in the future of this society. I hadn’t realised just how bad the problem was, but it really is horrific. And schools don’t know how to tackle this problem – because porn is much more accessible than education. Porn brings stimulation and enjoyment that education can’t – and education won’t win.
Teachers are some of the least respected – but most important influences – in our children’s lives. They are seen as an enemy to some, and for those children who have parents who also didn’t respect their education and don’t instil a positive message in their children, there lies the problem. I feel for those going into a teaching career hoping to change the world but having such little support to do so. We live in a society where we promote children to worry about how they look, how they dress and that ‘likes’ are a representation of their worth. We have also brought about a society that gives children access to an amazing platform – the internet – but also forget that the internet is full of bad as much as it is full of good, and some parents are naive in thinking their children are oblivious to it. The discussion I witnessed today is a perfect example of this.
This has been an eye opener for me as to the problem in our communities – and I’m going to take this experience and speak to people who can influence and see if there is anything we can do to change this. I wasn’t able to speak up today – as weren’t the other 30 people sat around having to listen to them. But, I was able to realise that there is a much bigger problem – and I’m going to try take a positive from this and make some kind of difference. This happened for a reason and I’m going to hopefully make it worthwhile.